I know, I know

I haven’t written.  I’ve been licking my wounds in an attempt to recover from what I thought was my ticket out of this job, a new opportunity, the answer to my prayers. . . the interview went well, I got the job offer, I was excited.  And then the salary.  Are you kidding me?  It was lateral, at best.  What’s my incentive to move?  I countered, they came back with an additional $1k tacked on.  I was soooooooo upset.  I cried and cried.  I toyed with the idea of accepting, just so I could move on to something else, but that night I woke up twice in a panic, sitting bolt upright in bed, thinking What have I done?  So when I really got up in the morning, I knew no one was forcing me to take this position, that as much as I want out and want to move on, I don’t have to take whatever presents itself.  I can choose.

It was with much disappointment that I declined the offer, but not without beating myself up about it first.  Am I not “worth” a decent salary?  Did I somehow come off as a loser in my interview?  What did I do to rate such an offer?  I keep telling myself it’s not me, it’s this economy.  Employers know a lot of people are without jobs and will take whatever they can get to get by.  Heck, I’m in that situation myself.  I’m grateful to have  a job, but this isn’t what I want to be doing a year from now.  Knowing that, employers can offer lower salaries and see who bites.  That’s what I think anyway.  And someone will take that position and be glad to have it.  I’m happy for that person.  Now if I could just get my own little ray of sunshine in the job search. 🙂

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Filed under job search, me, rants & raves, working mom

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